Wednesday, April 19, 2017

{Character Interview} Hans Jaeger of 'The Feet Say Run'



We’re thrilled to be talking to Hans Jaeger from Dan Blum’s The Feet Say Run.  It is a pleasure to have Hans with us today at Pimp That Character!

Thank you for your interview, Hans  How old are you and what do you do for a living?

I am eighty-five.  I started working in my father’s factory in Germany, making brass instruments before the war.  After the war I sold refrigerators for the Amana Corporation.  After that I became a kidney dealer for wealthy transplant-recipients.

Can you tell us about one of your most distinguishable features?

In spite of my age, my erection is firm as a senator’s handshake.

What would I love the most about you?

There is nothing to love or hate.  What do these words even mean?  I am who I am. 

What is in your refrigerator right now?

I am at present on a deserted island with a few survivors, hoping for a rescue.  There is no refrigerator.  In our food collection there are dove eggs, roots, snails, a coconut-like fruit we call “assfruit”. 

What is your most treasured possession?

My memories, especially of the women I have loved, but also of childhood, in the 1930s, in Germany. 

What is the trait you least like about yourself?

Some say that I committed a terrible crime.  That I fled.  My son believes this.  I will leave it to others to judge.  

Who is your best friend?

Her name is Dawn.  She is as young and beautiful as I am old and unbeautiful.  We play chess together.  We are equally matched.  She is the perfect opponent. 

Do you have children?

I have a son who has not spoken to me in decades. 

When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

I had few career aspirations.  Vague dreams, really, and all shattered by the war anyway, so it’s just as well I had no fixed plan.  But I knew I loved girls, even a young age.  I knew I wanted to fall in love. 


If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do today?

I probably am going to die tomorrow.  Yet there is nothing more to do.  My day will be the same as any other.  I will gather roots.  Keep the fire going.  Mix memory and delusion.  Dream. 

About the Author

Daniel A. Blum grew up in New York, attended Brandeis University and currently lives outside of Boston with his family. His first novel Lisa33 was published by Viking in 2003. He has been featured in Poets and Writers magazine, Publisher’s Weekly and most recently, interviewed in Psychology Today.

Daniel writes a humor blog, The Rotting Post, that has developed a loyal following.

His latest release is the literary novel, The Feet Say Run.

WEBSITE & SOCIAL LINKS:

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About the Book:

Title: THE FEET SAY RUN
Author: Daniel A. Blum
Publisher: Gabriel’s Horn Press
Pages: 349
Genre: Literary Fiction

At the age of eighty-five, Hans Jaeger finds himself a castaway among a group of survivors on a deserted island.  What is my particular crime?  he asks.   Why have I been chosen  for this fate?  And so he begins his extraordinary chronicle. 

It would be an understatement to say he has lived a full life.  He has grown up in Nazi Germany and falls in love with Jewish girl.  He fights for the Germans on two continents, watches the Reich collapse spectacularly into occupation and starvation, and marries his former governess.  After the war he goes on wildflower expeditions in the Alps, finds solace among prostitutes while his wife lay in a coma, and marries a Brazilian chambermaid in order to receive a kidney from her. 

By turns sardonic and tragic and surreal, Hans’s story is the story of all of the insanity, irony and horror of the modern world itself.  

FOR MORE INFORMATION:

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Tuesday, April 18, 2017

{Character Interview} Roxie Honeycutt of 'Wooing the Wedding Planner'





We’re thrilled to be talking to Roxie Honeycutt from Amber Leigh Williams’s Wooing the Wedding Planner.  It is a pleasure to have her with us today at Pimp That Character!

Thank you for your interview, Roxie.  How old are you and what do you do for a living?

Let’s not get into too many specifics on the matter of age. We’ll just say early thirties and I’m a wedding planner.

Can you tell us about one of your most distinguishable features?

My smile. I’m an optimist. Some would say I’m the eternal optimist. I think a good smile reflects that.

Where do you go when you are angry?

Well, I’ve smacked a couple of men so it seems I’m in need of a more constructive outlet in terms of aggression. Don’t worry, the second guy definitely deserved it. The first was kind enough to laugh it off with me later. He’s that hot new neighbor guy. Did I mention Byron?

What is in your refrigerator right now?

A bottle of Cristal. It was a housewarming present. I’m teaching myself to cook so there’s an odd assortment of test ingredients. Oh, and a casserole from my friend Briar – just in case my cooking efforts fall through.

What is your most treasured possession?

Right now – this house! It’s gorgeous – old-fashioned Victorian and everything I’ve ever dreamed of living in! Only there’s Byron. He seems to think it’s his, too. There’s some dispute about that. You can be sure of that.

What is the trait you most not like about yourself?

Doubting myself – my appearance or abilities. I have one of those mothers. You know the type: never satisfied with who you are. I think that’s why I’m as positive and forward-thinking as I can be – to drown out that doubting voice in my head that sounds too much like her.

Do you think the author portrayed you accurately?

I think at times she had a little too much fun planting me and a stubborn cynic in the same living space. Sometimes I think she did this for her own enjoyment. However, the payoff is…rewarding. I’ll say that!

If you could change one physical thing about yourself, what would that be?

I spent too much of my life torturing myself over whether my appearance is up to standards. I’m done with that now. I’m me and that’s plenty.

What’s your idea of a perfect meal?

Something I don’t burn or undercook. So far, that’s pie. Would you like a slice? It’s packed with juicy apples, cinnamon and sin. Oops! Did I say sin? I wasn’t thinking about sin. Even if I was, it’s Byron’s fault. He might’ve kissed me somewhere along the lines of the baking process and now I can’t remember exactly what that process entailed.

Someone is secretly in love with you.  Who is it and how do you feel about that?

My friends keep telling me it’s Byron. Also his sisters. His mother, too, keeps hinting it. Oh, and his great-aunt. But I’m not ready to get involved with anyone this soon after the divorce. And neither Byron nor I are the kind of people who are capable of casual dating…are we??

About the Author

Amber Leigh Williams is a Harlequin romance writer who lives on the US Gulf Coast. She lives for beach days, the smell of real books, and spending time with her husband and their two young children. When she’s not keeping up with rambunctious little ones (and two large dogs), she can usually be found reading a good book or indulging her inner foodie. Amber is represented by the D4EO Literary Agency.

WEBSITE & SOCIAL LINKS:

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About the Book:

Title: WOOING THE WEDDING PLANNER
Author: Amber Leigh Williams
Publisher: Harlequin (Superromance)
Pages: 380
Genre: Series Romance/Contemporary Romance/Superromance
No more wedding marches for her! 

Wedding planner Roxie Honeycutt can make happy-ever-after come true for anyone except herself. Freshly divorced and done with love, she's okay with watching clients walk down the aisle. What's not okay? Sharing a charming Victorian house with accountant Byron Strong. He's frustratingly sexy and determined to keep her confused. 

Roxie thought Byron's expertise was numbers, yet somehow he sees her for who she really is. Somehow he understands the hurt she hides behind a trademark smile. Suddenly romance is tempting again, even if it means risking another heartbreak.

FOR MORE INFORMATION:

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Wednesday, April 12, 2017

{Character Interview} Max Doler of 'The Investment Club'




We’re thrilled to be talking to Max Doler from Doug Cooper’s The Investment Club.  It’s a pleasure to have him with us today at Pimp That Character!

Thank you for your interview, Max.  How old are you and what do you do for a living?

Max: I’m thirty-six and an entrepreneur. Perhaps you’ve heard of one of my products, The Lapkin, a napkin specially designed for your lap. We had an infomercial that ran pretty consistently a few years back then McDonald’s did a drive-thru promotion with it for about a year.

Can you tell us about one of your most distinguishable features?

Max: Well you can see from looking at me, I’m a dwarf, or little person, if you want to be politically correct. Technically, it’s known as achondroplasia, my trunk is average size, but my arms are proportionately smaller.

What would I love the most about you?

Max: I’m a doer. I built my company, Max Doler Investing, from a small operation in the living room of my one-bedroom apartment in Henderson, Nevada into a multi-million-dollar international company.

What would I hate the most about you?

Max: I’m completely lovable. I don’t think there is anything you would hate. (laughs) Nah, I guess if I had to pick something, I’ve been known from time-to-time to be a bit arrogant and self-destructive.

What is in your refrigerator right now?

Max: Only Voss bottled water. I eat out for all my meals. I’m too busy to shop and cook.

What is your most treasured possession?

Max: The original prototype of the Lapkin I created when I was ten years old. Only thing I kept from my childhood. Had a special safe with a an unbreakable viewing window designed for it for my bedroom so I could see it every day as a reminder of how it all started.

Do you think the author portrayed you accurately?

Max: Yeah, I think Doug got me pretty well. I was probably a bigger jerk in the beginning than he let on, but everything in there is true.

If you could change one physical thing about yourself, what would that be?

Max: I’d be less handsome. It makes me uncomfortable how people stare at me for being so good-looking. (laughs)

Are you a loner or do you prefer to surround yourself with friends?

Max: I’m a total loner. When you’re given up for adoption at birth and shuffled around foster homes, you learn to rely on only yourself. It’s served me fairly well though. Although this blackjack crew in the book softened me up a bit.

If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do today?

Max: I would donate all of my wealth and holdings to a trust to support the businesses, the Oasis Mission and Miss C’s Music & Dance School at my facility at the Western Hotel in downtown Vegas except for one million dollars. I’d take that million to the El Cortez Casino down on Fremont Street and play blackjack and drink cognac until either the money or I was gone. If any money  was left at the end of the day, I’d give it to a random stranger.

About the Author


Doug Cooper is the author of the award-winning novel Outside In and The Investment Club available October 2016. He has a BS in Mathematics Education from Miami University and a MA in American Studies from Saint Louis University. Always searching, he has traveled to over twenty countries on five continents, exploring the contradictions between what we believe and how we act in the pursuit of truth, beauty, and love. Originally from Port Clinton, Ohio, he has also called Cleveland, St. Louis, Detroit, New York, and Oslo, Norway home. He now lives in Cleveland working on his third novel Focus Lost.

WEBSITE & SOCIAL LINKS:

WEBSITE | TWITTER | FACEBOOK | GOODREADS


About the Book:

Forty million people visit Vegas every year but most never get past the strip. What about the people who live there? What brought them there? What keeps them there?

Told from the perspective of a seasoned blackjack dealer, The Investment Club tells the stories of a self-destructive, dwarf entrepreneur, a drug-addicted musical performer-turned-stripper, a retired, widowed New Jersey policeman, a bereaved, divorced female sportscaster, and a card-counting, former Catholic priest before and after their fateful meeting at the El Cortez Casino in downtown Vegas.

As the five learn the greatest return comes from investing in one another, their lives stabilize and take on new, positive directions. But their love and support for each other can take them only so far before they must determine the meaning and value of their own lives.

FOR MORE INFORMATION:

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